What is the Deal with PA weather?

Lately it has either been 98 degrees with 64% humidity or 75 degrees with 96% humidity. Both situations suck.

Pennsylvania weather is always wonky. They say the seasons in PA are winter, still winter, construction, and almost winter. In the spring it's usually always cold as hell except for about 3 days where we have gorgeous, 75 degree with not much humidity and a nice breeze days. You can tell summer is here when you go to bed in flannel pajamas wrapped up in your comforter one night and wake up the next morning after having lost 20 pounds due to sweat because it's 90 degrees outside. Another harbinger of summer is the official PA landmark: the orange and white traffic cylinders that people inevitably hit and knock over into the middle of the road. You do a couple months of unbearable heat which usually results in water restrictions and every story in every newspaper and every news show being about the drought and ways to conserve water with some tidbits about avoiding heat exhaustion sprinkled in. You'd think Pennsylvanians were idiots, constantly having to be reminded to take showers instead of baths and to drink water when they go outside. Oh, wait...

After this is over, we have fall. Fall is actually pretty nice here. During the day anyway. You can walk outside to get your mail in mild but warm temperatures, and by the time you walk back to your house it's 40 degrees. Fall turns to winter much the same way spring turns to summer. You go to sleep one night in shorts and a T-shirt with your windows open and wake up the next morning with 2 feet of snow on the ground. Snow sucks in PA. In states that don't get a lot of snow, everything is shut down if they get 2 snowflakes, so they don't have to worry about trying to drive in it. In states that get a lot of snow, everyone knows how to drive in it, and it is cleared effectively. In PA, no one knows how to drive in the snow, even though we get a decent amount, and PennDot is worthless at clearing it. They clear a 2-foot path on major roadways and expect 2 lanes of cars to safely travel through. Then they pile that snow at intersections so you can't see when you're trying to turn. After that, the 2-foot paths turn to sheets of ice, and every news outlet talks about how PennDot is going to run out of road salt. This happens every. single. year. You can tell spring has arrived when daffodils bloom on only to be covered with snow and die the next day.

In true York Countian fashion, I have written a long, rambling post about the weather.

*I really wish the Weather Channel's website would get rid of that ad for toe fungus. It's nice that they stopped showing the one where they lift the toenail, but it's still nasty.

You'd Think There Was a Full Moon

Man, everyone is being so pissy lately, myself included. I'm involved in this little game at the TWoP boards and everyone over their has his or her panties in a bunch and is accusing other people of trying to rig the game. SERENITY NOW!!!!!!!!!!!

On a totally unrelated note, this is neat. I love maps and globes and the like, and for whatever reason, I think it's really cool to notice how lit up major cities are from space. It's also cool to see the progression of day-time. Like right now, it's pitch black here in PA, but it's still blazing daylight in California. I amuse easily.

Begin Rant.

I really hate rude people. I will bend over backwards and do cartwheels for someone who is nice to me, but for someone who isn't, I'll do the minimum necessary to keep my job. I was at the deli counter of the grocery store today, and the woman said, "Give me such and such cheese." Have you heard of please and thank you? I used to work in the service industry, so I am very nice to people who do those jobs, but I was nice to them even before I had that job.

I guess sometimes rude people do get what they want though. My friend and I went to the Outback Steakhouse for dinner one night. They have a call-ahead thing where your wait is cut in half, and they clearly tell you this when you call. My friend and I were told that the wait was 2 hours (we hadn't called in) which would make the wait for call-ahead people 1 hour. Not unreasonable for a Friday night at a new restaurant. While we were at the hostess stand this woman storms up and said, "We called ahead! Why do we have to wait for an hour?!" She got seated right away. Everyone around was like, "What a bitch!" Why do those people get special treatment? She should have been made to wait the whole 2 hours. It's not like losing 1 set of customers in a restaurant that crowded would make a difference in their bottom line.

End rant.

The "Real" World

I remember watching Real World: Seattle and loving it. Of course, I was 17 (18?) at the time, and my tastes have changed since then. But I'm watching Real World: Austin now and thinking about how stupid the show has become. Back in my day there was more to RW than people getting drunk and hooking up. It's disconcerting, because I know the majority of people watching this show are in middle or high school, and they're watching these people thinking this behavior is cool and acceptable. Which is why it has become "cool" and "acceptable." Not that the Real World takes sole responsibility for this, but you know what I mean.

Hey, if you want to go out and get drunk and get a piece of ass, good for you. But please realize what the real world is. In the real world most people don't live in a fabulous house with a jacuzzi and a pool, especially not at age 21. Going out and getting drunk every night in the real world doesn't translate well into holding down a 9-5 job. And if you can't hold down a job, you can't afford to go out and get drunk every night. It's called alcoholism (just tell your psychiatrist to code you as a 305.00--he or she will know what you're talking about). Hooking up with 5 different strangers in the real world can lead to fatherless children and/or discharge coming out of places where you definitely don't want discharge to be coming out of. And yes, if you act like you're easy, guys will want to sleep with you. But wanting to sleep with you and wanting to have a relationship with you are two different things. Some guys will tell you they love you to get you in bed.

I'm just warning any kiddos who may read this: get a hobby besides partying, find friends with whom you can talk while you're sober, pay attention in college (or high school if you college isn't for you), and learn how to survive on your own without relying on mommy and daddy to bail you out. You'll thank me later.

God, I'm old.

Huh?

Can someone please explain to me why having framed copies of the Ten Commandments in courthouses is not ok, but a granite monument with the Ten Commandments on it at the state capitol in Texas is? And how is it possible that having that monument at the state capitol is not governmental endorsement of religion? Aren't the Ten Commandments the groundwork of Christianity, which is a religion? Just checking.

I Love StatCounter

The Megalopolis of Shippensburg

Someone found my blog by searching for "Family Guy You've Got AIDS." Heh heh. Also, someone from Ship read it. Shippensburg in da house, yo! When I followed the link to that person's Shippensburg search, I found a blog that mentioned that Ship is getting a Wendy's and Chambersburg is getting a Target. What the hell!? The only fast food we had in Ship when I was there was McDonalds, which gets old after 4 years, and Burger King, which I hate. The nearest Wendy's was in Chambersburg (15 minute drive), and the nearest Target was in Hagerstown, MD (long drive). We're movin' on up. To the East Side. To the De-lux townhouses which they also apparently have now. They also have a Wal-Mart now, but I don't go there anymore, and K-Mart and the Dollar Store served us just fine.

Cry Me a River

Oprah Winfrey was denied entry into a Hermes store in Paris 15 minutes after it had closed. I hate the sense of entitlement that celebrities have. For Oprah to be angry that she was unable to go shopping at a store after it had closed just goes to show you that celebrities in our society have way too much power.

Read the story here.

Oh, snap!

I'm sure katie will have something similar posted soon, as I am well aware of her Tom Cruise love, but this is too funny to pass up. Friday morning's Today Show portrayed a rather awkward interview between Matt Lauer and Tom Cruise, in which Matt Lauer used the phrase, "googley-gook." The argument was about the use of psychiatric drugs, something that $cientology doesn't support.

This interview was a hilarious trainwreck. Tom Cruise is such an idiot! He spoke out against electroconvulsive therapy (ECT), which is rarely used, but can work if used correctly; Adderall and Ritalin because they are sold as street drugs (which has what to do with their effectiveness in treating ADHD, Tom?); and psychiatry in general. Dr. Cruise also tells us that there is no such thing as a chemical imbalance; in other words, mental disorders are all in one's head. If that's the case, then why are monozygotic (identical) twins twice as likely to both have a unipolar disorder (i.e. Major Depressive Disorder) than dizygotic (fraternal) twins, and about 3.5 times as likely to have Bipolar disorder? Why do alcoholism and schizophrenia run in families? Why do anti-depressants and anti-psychotics work? If I, with only a B.A. in Psychology and 5 minutes of research in my Abnormal Psychology textbook from college, can blow his theory out of the water, imagine the damage that someone with a Ph.D. or a Psy.D. in Psychology and years of published research under his or her belt could do? I wonder why no one from the field is speaking out against his propaganda?

You can read the transcript at the Drudge Report.

I'm a Lightweight

I don't know what the hell my problem is. I drank one Fuzzy Navel wine cooler last night and was stumbling around all over the place. I didn't drink it that fast and I had just eaten dinner a few hours before, so it wasn't that. I drink beer semi-regularly, and I never even feel anything. Then I fell asleep on the couch. I'm such a party animal!

I love the new blogger picture-adder thing. Now I can make my text wrap around the picture, which is something I'm not advanced enough to figure out using html.

How come I never get carded buying alcohol, but I always get carded buying cigarettes? How can I look 21, but not 18? The liquor store or beer distributors have more to lose by selling booze to a minor than the convenience stores and gas stations do by selling cigarettes to someone under 18. I'm 24, for God's sake! Do I really look like I'm under 18?!

I read in the paper yesterday that Penn State started offering benefits to same-sex couples in January! Penn State moved up a couple points for me. They had another list of schools that offer benefits, but my college, Shippensburg University, wasn't on it. Let's get with the times, Ship!

It's an Addiction

I stole this from The Perhaps Dramatic Life, linked on feather's blog.

1. What kind of underwear are you wearing, and what color are they? Victoria's Secret (or a similar non-expensive brand) bikini satin underwear. That's all I wear. I had blue ones on, but I changed to white after I took a shower.
2. What songs do you want played at your funeral? Ding Dong the Witch is Dead
3. What would your last meal be before being executed? french onion soup, lobster, filet mignon, crab cakes, baked potato with butter and sour cream, salad, and tiramisu. If I'm going to go out, I'm going to go out in style.
4. Beatles or Stones? Beatles. I loathe the Stones.
5. If you had to pick one person on earth to die, who would it be? Hmmm... don't know.
6. The person whose problems you don't want to hear? The people who call me at work.
7. What is the thing most important to you about the preferred sex? Intelligence
8. Do you secretly hate some of your friends but are too nice to reject them? No.
10. Favorite hangover cure? Water and ibuprofin
11. How many drinks does it take to get you drunk? I don't know. I usually fall asleep before I get drunk.

current clothing: My '95 field hockey shirt and a pair of boxers
current mood: Tired
current taste: Cigarettes and beer. I'm klassy right now.
current hair: Wet
current annoyance: The woman who called me 2 minutes before I was ready to leave for work and talked to me for 17 minutes.
current smell: Cigarette smoke
current thing you ought to be doing: Straightening up
current jewelry: None
current book: The Corrections by Jonathan Franzen
current refreshment: I just finished my beer.
current worry: That this new mosquito bite I have gave me West Nile Virus (thanks, J!)
current longing: To go to England.
current music: None
current wish: To be rich and not have to work full-time
current lyric in your head: The "You've got AIDS" song. See previous post.
current regret: Nothing now.
current desktop picture: A picture of a pink and purple sunset with trees. Gotta love Webshots!
current plans for tonight/weekend: I'm doing stuff with MR tomorrow
current cuss word du jour: Asshat.
current disappointment: That I can't find my CD with my NewsRadio episodes on it.
current amusement: The "You've got AIDS" song.

WITHOUT LOOKING, guess what the time it is?9:45 pm
Now look at the clock, what is the actual time?: 9: 29 pm
With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?: Cars driving by, some redneck yelling, a radio interview with Bo Bice that I downloaded.
When did you last step outside? 7:30. I sat outside for about an hour.
Did you dream last night? There was a house next to ours that you had to climb a ladder to get in the front door. My neighbors told me that the people who lived there were old and I was wondering how they got up there. Also, I had to walk through a restaurant to get to my house.
When did you last laugh? While I was watching Good Eats.
What is on the walls of the room you are in?: A calender, a clock, a corner shelf with knick knacks, my CD rack, a mirror, and a bulletin board
Seen anything weird lately?: I think I've become immune to weirdness.

It's Official: I'm Going to Hell

The other week on Family Guy, they sang a barbershop quartet-style song that went, "You've got AIDS. Not HIV, but really full-blown AIDS." This guy called me at work the other day and told me he had AIDS. God help me, that song popped into my head. Now, I know I'm a cold, heartless bitch, but I truly feel bad for people who have AIDS. This guy made me sad because he sounded so dejected. I didn't laugh, but the fact that that popped into my head makes me feel like a total ass hole. I'm a horrible, horrible person. I was really nice to him though, and I told him about a program we have for people infected or affected by HIV and AIDS that pays for therapy and psychiatric services and offered to send him a brocure. He seemed happy about that.

P.S. Why does the blogger spell checker tell me to replace a word with the exact same word? It's worse than the Microsoft word grammar checker!

P.P.S. Maybe I'm not going to hell. I called this guy on the waiting list with the cutest Louisiana accent and he called me ma'am and said, "God bless you."

Random Thoughts Revisited

Sleeve is a funny word. Say it over and over. Isn't it weird?

It sucks that Kurt Cobain is dead. I think Nirvana would have reached the levels of the other great bands if he hadn't been killed by one of Courtney Love's goons (yes, I'm in the conspiracy camp).

I miss Phil Hartman. He was so hilarious! "I'm Troy McClure. You might remember me from such films as..." I love the Troy McClure film where they're at the meat packing plant, and then Ralph says, "When I grow up, I want to go to Bovine University." He was excellent in NewsRadio too. I think 95% of the funny NewsRadio scenes involved either Phil or Dave Foley or both of them together. So sad...

All that talking about grammar got me thinking. If I were a high school English teacher I would probably end up rocking on the floor of the padded room of the loony bin because my students didn't care as much about grammar as I did. Either that, or I'd be an old hag who ends up alone with her cats to keep her company. If I were a college English professor I'd end up failing all of my students, and then I'd get fired.

Grammar Nazi

*Note - I am in no way criticizing the people who make these mistakes, just the mistakes themselves. Also, I do not claim to have perfect grammar.

I think I have pretty good grammar. I've always been a language person. I'm a voracious reader, have had 8 years (4 in high school and 4 in college) of Spanish, 1 year in high school of Latin, and 1 semester of French in college. I also took 2 more English courses than I needed in high school and 1 more than I needed in college. Grammar just clicked for me one year in high school, and it sure as hell wasn't because of the teacher. I just started to understand everything out of the blue. Things like double negatives don't bother me in day-to-day speech because I'm so used to them. But to have a grammatical or punctuation error in something that is published by a business is unacceptable. All that said, here is a list of my biggest grammar pet peeves. I've thrown in some spelling/meaning peeves too.

1. The misuse of your/you're. There was a high school kid who died in a car accident, and the local newspaper ran a picture of some girls writing on the road in chalk. They had written, "Your going to be missed." Oy vey. Example of correct usage: Dad, you're not going to believe what I did to your car.

2. The misuse of their/they're/there. Example of correct usage: They're going over there to their parents' house.

People, if you have graduated from high school, there is no reason why you shouldn't know the difference between these words.

3. The incorrect usage of his/her vs. their. It makes me cringe when someone says, "Everyone get out their book." While I understand that it is awkward to say, "Everyone get out his or her book," it's worth it.

It would be correct in the following example, however: "Michael Jackson and John Wayne Gacy co-wrote a book on childcare. Did everyone buy a copy of their book?"

4. Total disregard for the subjunctive tense.

It is NEVER correct to say, "If I was..." The subjunctive is used when something has not yet happened or cannot possibly happen. For example, "If I were the president, I would outlaw incorrect grammar." Am I the president? No. Not yet, anyway. Unfortunately, some songwriters have trouble with this concept:

"If I Was Invisible" - Clay Aiken
"What If God Was One of Us?" - Some chick from the early 90s
"If I was your girl, all the things I'd do to you" - Janet Jackson, "If"

5. Some random spelling/meaning issues:

You affect the effect.
Definitely has the word finite in it.
There is a rat in separate.
There is a parent in apparent.
I don't care if irregardless is in the dictionary; it's not a word.

6. Incorrect usage of adjectives/adverbs. Adjectives describe, adverbs tell how something is done (quickly, softly). It is never ok to say, "I'm doing good." You're doing well. One gray area is the difference between "I feel well" and "I feel good." I would think both are correct depending on the context. If you're using well as the opposite of sick then "I feel well" would be correct. Otherwise, it means that you're good at touching something. "I feel good" would be correct if you were using it as the opposite of feeling crappy.

Can you tell I'm really bored at work tonight?

Penn to the Sylvania

Pennsylvania's Official State Beverage: Milk.

I heard on the radio this morning that the Bloodhound Gang is starting a petition to change the official state song of Pennsylvania from "Pennsylvania" by Eddie Khoury and Ronnie Bonner to "Pennsylvania" by the Bloodhound Gang.

Here is the Bloodhound gang's state song website. You can listen to the song and/or sign a petition to have the song changed.

Here are the lyrics to the current state song.

Here is Pennsylvania's own website, in case you are interested in looking at boring websites.

Here is a website with more Pennsylvania symbols. We have lame symbols.

Random Thoughts

I want to play Half-Life, but Chris is asleep on the couch behind me, and I don't think he wants to be awakened by the sound of me shooting aliens and Marines with a sub-machine gun. Therefore, I'm watching Dancing With the Stars, or whatever it's called. It's meh, except for the fact that Joey McIntyre is on. Squeeeee! I loved the New Kids back in the day. I had sheets, posters, books, trading cards, towels, etc. Oh, who the hell am I kidding. Back in the day? I still have some NKOTB mp3s on my computer, and if I could locate my old tapes, I would listen to them. I love his Boston accent!

What's the deal with dead birds in our yard? I found another one tonight on our front porch area.

I called my mom to invite my parents over for dinner and the first Saturday she was available was in the middle of August. It's sad that my mom has a more active social life than I do.

I sat outside for an hour tonight drinking beer, reading the paper, and watching the goings-on. It was nice to just sit and relax.

While I was sitting outside watching the goings-on, I saw a person do an idiotic thing (hard to believe, I know). We live near an intersection that frequently backs up past our "driveway." There was a truck stopped at the intersection and a minivan about 10 feet behind him. Someone drove up and wanted to turn left into our driveway thingy, so the minivan backed up instead of just pulling up a couple feet. Idiots!

A Topic That Is Near and Dear to My Heart

The Apostrophe Protection Society.

Another Great Time-Waster at Work

Click.

To the Person at Catawba College Who Reads My Blog...

I don't know who you are, but my grandparents both went there (that's where they met). My grandfather is in the Catawba Football Hall of Fame--his name is Harry Dinges. Yes, Harry Dinges. Talk about unfortunate names.

28 Up

Ok, my Up Series love is running out of steam. I do not recommend watching these movies back to back, as they rehash every. single. thing. in. every. movie. This was the first time they were older than I am, so it was interesting to view them that way rather than as children. The movie was still great, but I'm about to gouge my eyes out if I have to watch the same scenes yet again (think about it--I've seen the scenes from 7 Up 4 times now). And I have 35 Up waiting for me at home. Arghhhh!!! I'll definitely take a break before 42...

My Top 10 Favorite Songs of All-Time

It's really hard for me to answer the question, "What is your favorite song/band?" I love so many different groups, singers, songs, and genres that I can't narrow it down. Therefore, this list is subject to change at a moment's notice, but it usually doesn't. For some of the groups I had to randomly pick songs because I love them all, but I think it accurately reflects my favorites. Here goes, in no particular order:

1. "Goodbye Yellow Brick Road" - Elton John (From Goodbye Yellow Brick Road)



I recently became absolutely enamored with Elton John's older music. This song is catchy as hell, and I like Elton's snide defiance. The way he pronounces vodka and tonic (vodker and tonic)? So cute!

2 and 3. "Halo" and "Sweetest Perfection" - Depeche Mode (From Violator)



"I stop and I stare too much/Afraid that I care too much/And I hardly dare to touch/for fear that the spell may be broken" Violator is considered by many DM fans to be the sellout album ("Personal Jesus," "Enjoy the Silence"). While I agree that saying you are a DM fan and your favorite songs are "JP" and "EtS" is like saying you're a Metallica fan and your favorite song is "Enter Sandman," or you are a Led Zeppelin fan and your favorite song is "Stairway," they aren't necessarily bad songs. And even when I'm sick of them, I know I can just skip over them and listen to the 7 other awesome songs on the album.

4. "Strangelove" - Depeche Mode (From Music for the Masses)



There are three types of Depeche Mode: bad (in a good way) early 80's techno Depeche Mode ("Just Can't Get Enough"); moody, brooding Depeche Mode (every song on Songs of Faith and Devotion); and middle-of-the-road Depeche Mode (Music for the Masses). This song has a great melody and pretty cool lyrics ("There are times/when my crimes/will seem almost unforgivable/I give in/to sin/because you have to make this life livable").

5. "Have a Cigar" - Pink Floyd (From Wish You Were Here)



The intro to this songs kicks all kinds of ass, and I love how it mocks the ignorance of the powers that be in the "industry." "The band is just fantastic/that's really what I think/And by the way/Which one's Pink?"

6. "Lovesong" - The Cure (From Disintegration)



I feel that I like enough songs by The Cure to be able to put this song in my Top 10. How romantic, yet sad, is this song?

7. "Close to Me" - The Cure (From The Head on the Door)



I got into The Cure during my teenage angst years. I love the desperation and depression in this song. Upon first listen, The Cure's songs sound so upbeat and happy. Then you listen to the lyrics. That's what I like about them: they make you think.

8. "In Your Eyes" - Peter Gabriel (From So)



Peter Gabriel is pretty good. He's not my favorite, but he doesn't suck. This song is from Say Anything, which is one of the greatest movies of all time. It still gives me chills every time I hear it.

9. "Get Up, Stand Up" - Bob Marley (From Legend, among other albums)



When I was in 8th grade I was at the Washington Zoo wearing a Bob Marley shirt. I received a look from a black teenager that said, "Stupid cracker, you're not allowed to like Bob Marley." Whatever. I am a cracker, but I still love Bob Marley. "Most people think/great God will come from the skies/take away everything/and make everybody feel high./But if you know what life is worth/you will look for yours on Earth." Exactly.

10. "Immigrant Song" - Led Zeppelin (From III)



If I were in charge of the music at hockey games, this is the song that would play as the players took the ice. This song has a great riff. I lost some respect for Led Zeppelin when they let P. Diddy sample one of their songs though. Led Zeppelin, P. Diddy is not even in the same league as you. You are the world series champions and he is a bunch of kids playing ball in their back yard using trees as bases. Why would you let him bastardize your music?

So there it is! That was a great way to waste tons of time at work! I may have to do movie and TV lists as well!

Heh heh

Hilarious. I can laugh about this publicly now that I know I'm not the only person in the world who hates Tom Cruise. I've always hated him; I never thought he was good-looking or a good actor. And he's a $cientologist (Why, John Travolta; why?!)

England

I decided last night that I'm not going to wait till I'm old to go to England; I plan to go within the next 5 years, preferably within the next 2. Plane tickets aren't as expensive as I thought they would be if you buy them way ahead of time. I get really lazy and complacent if I don't set goals for myself, so this is my goal. If anyone has been and has any tips, let me know!

Theft!

I took this from Jenn's blog; she took it from someone else's. I deleted some of the redundant/stupid/obvious/not interesting questions in the interest of time (I have to leave for my parents' house in a few minutes). I used to love wasting my time with these little surveys.

EVER BEEN...

Arrested: No
Hand Cuffed: No
In Love: Yes
In a Fight: Yes
Contact Fight: No
In Debt: No
In the hospital: No
On illegal drugs: Yes
Drunk: Yes
High: Yes
On Tv: No
Grounded: Yes, 99.9% of my life as a teenager

ONE OR THE OTHER

Meat/Veggies: I like both, but I guess I'd choose meat.
Love/Money: If it's all or nothing, I'd have to choose money because you can't survive without it.
Family/Career: Family
Fat/Skinny: It depends how skinny. Fat people can usually lose weight, naturally skinny people have a very hard time gaining. I choose thin :-).
Busy/Lazy: Busy
Car/Bike: Car
Summer/Winter: Summer
Beach/Mountain: Mountain
Travel/Work: Travel
1 Best Friend/100 'friends': 1 best friend

OPINIONS What are your thoughts on?

Gay marriage? : There's nothing wrong with it. It'll be legal eventually; give it time.
Abortions? : I'm pro-choice
Gays in the military? : Why not?
Human labels?: I call 'em like I see 'em.
Clothing labels?: If I could afford designer stuff I'd have it, but for now I'm happy with getting my clothes at Target and/or Old Navy
Bush? : Hate.
Racism? : It's wrong to hate people based on race.

RANDOM QUESTIONS:

Do you believe in love at first sight? No
Are you happy with who you are? Sort of.
If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? Height
Do you think that today?s society is pressured by the media (TV, magazines, etc)? Yes
Did Michael Jackson molest those kids? I honestly don't know.
Was OJ guilty? Yes

ARE YOU MORE OF A?

Daredevil or Safety-dweller? Safe
Bitch or Pushover? The majority of the time I'm a pushover
Closed minded or Open minded? I'd like to think I'm open-minded, but I'm not as open-minded as I think I am.
Comedian or Serious? Serious
Traveler or Stay-at-home? Stay at home

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT?

People who PRETEND to cut themselves? Lame
People who cut themselves just to be cool? Lame
Child Molestation? Umm...does anyone actually like child molestation besides the people who do it? It's disgusting.
Marilyn Manson? He's not even relevant anymore.
Britney Spears? She's klassy.
Braces? They're painful

Rude People Who Call Me at Work

One of Heather's latest posts reminded me of a conversation I had with a woman on Friday. I was doing an intake for her. At one point she asked me if we provided transportation (yes, we pick up all 50+ of our clients every day for their appointments). When I said no, she asked, "Well, how the hell am I supposed to get there!?" I explained to her the miracle of riding the bus or finding a ride. Then, after giving her directions and having to repeat them about 10 times she asked me how she was supposed to find the place. I explained to her that she could use a map or ask someone. And this woman has kids! How do I know she has kids? Because while I was on the phone with her, she yelled at them to shut the fuck up. I don't have a problem with swearing in general, but I do have a problem with people cussing at their kids, because when their kids turn around and cuss back, they beat them. How can someone with kids be so clueless about the basics of life?! I weep for the next generation.

Good Eats

I'm not normally a share-recipes-on-my-blog kind of person, but I made two really good things recently. The first was a tomato zucchini casserole. I sliced 3 zucchinis (is that the plural of zucchini?), 3 tomatoes, and an onion.* I put oil in a pan with some garlic and pepper and added the zucchini and onion. I cooked that for a while, and then added the tomato and some shredded parmesan cheese. 'Twas good. Tonight I made a shrimp scampi angel hair pasta thingy. I cooked some garlic and olive oil in a pan, cooked it, and added white wine, shrimp, basil, lemon juice, and some butter to thicken it. I poured it over angel hair. I hadn't felt like cooking much when it was 1,000 degrees out, so now that it's cooler I'm trying to make non-half-assed food.

*I used my new Pampered Chef Ultimate Slice and Grate, and it took like, 2 minutes.

And speaking of Good Eats, I hate that Alton Brown is associated with Iron Chef America. They totally lost the whole point of what made Iron Chef awesome.

An Apology...

Dear Depeche Mode,

I must apologize profusely. You see, as I was looking at the homepage for AOL, I saw a picture of a group of well-dressed men. Upon first glance, I thought it was you. I later realized that it was the Backstreet Boys. If you would like me to revoke ownership of your CDs, I totally understand.

Sincerely, and with most heartfelt apologies,

Jenny G

21 Up

I couldn't wait for the weekend to watch 21 Up, so I watched it last night. I felt like my babies had grown up, even though these people are now almost 50! This movie was a lot less awkward than Seven Plus Seven; I was amazed at how eloquent and mature everyone seemed at only 21. I wasn't like that. I guess it's a British thing; they sound sophisticated because of their accents and the phrases they use. All 14 of the subjects were still in this one, but most of them drop out for the next. This is disappointing because only 1 of my 3 snobby boys stays in. I noticed that the subjects who were cute as buttons as children look like they fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down for the past 14 years. The ones who were ugly are now quite attractive. But their teeth... The same could be said for their hair, but it was the 70s. I'm interested to see what it'll be like to watch them when they're older than I am. 4 stars.

My So-Called Best Friend

Warning: This post will be of no interest to anyone except one person. Read at your own risk of boredom and confusion.



What kind of a best friend would write an e-mail telling us that she FINALLY gave her digits to a certain Luke Wilson-looking guidance counselor without repeating the conversation verbatim? Especially when the e-mail is read too late to call and squeal? What kind of a best friend would make a "suggestion" (like in the Sims 2?) without telling her friends what said suggestion was?

I keed :-). Thank God that you grew cojones (not to be confused with cajones, which means drawers) and gave him your damn number! You have nothing to lose, and I hate to break it to you, but if you're afraid of making an ass out of yourself, you crossed that line a long time ago. Now, I know you are going away again soon, but I expect a detailed phone conversation or e-mail telling me every 14-year-old person detail. When you and Luke Wilson II get married, I will not wear taffeta or puffy sleeves. Call me, you bitch.

Mmmm...

Alton Brown is in a leisure suit on the cheese fondue show. Get it? Cheese? I don't really find him attractive, per say, but I think it's sexy that he can cook. My bf and I both want to marry him. I should get my fondue pot out of the recesses of the cabinet. When I was trying to find a picture of him in a leisure suit on Google for my blog, I saw a lot of mentions of Leisure Suit Larry. I never played that game, but I was obsessed with Gold Rush and King's Quest I and V. Awesome games.

This is the Title

You know it's going to be hot as hell when it's already 75 at 8:00 AM.

There was a car fire on the 2nd Street off-ramp today, so of course we had to be held up while people rubbernecked, even though the fire was out. I don't think I went fast enough for my speedometer to rise above 0 for the last 5 miles of my drive.

Some weird guy was in my office talking about filling his prescription this morning. Dude, do I look like a pharmacy?

Family Guy was hilarious last night. I'm so glad it's back!

I have to wrap my dad's Father's Day present.

Netflix Reviews for June 11-12

7 Up/Seven Plus Seven - This is a documentary that follows 14 British children from age 7 (1964) to the present (it is my understanding that 49 Up has been taped/is being taped this year). The first DVD contains two films, thus showing the children at ages 7 and 14. I absolutely loved these documentaries! Everyone who knows me knows that I love British things, and this is no exception. I moved the other films in the series up to the top of my queue, because I want to watch the rest of them as soon as possible. As awkward as it is to watch uncomfortable 14-year-olds be interviewed on camera, it was interesting to see the changes (or lack thereof) that they have made. For me, I was most intrigued by three boys in particular. In 7 Up, these boys were privileged, upper-crust, somewhat snobby boys who discussed which financial papers they read to get their stock quotes (hee!). The conversation is dominated by two of the boys. In Seven Plus Seven, the three of them are together again. Two of them are the same, while the one who did not have much to say (and still doesn't) looks obviously annoyed at what his former friends have to say about class, race, and money. The cutest parts were when one of the children said the Beatles were mad because of their haircuts and music, and when one of the boys said he didn't want to marry because his wife might make him greens and he hates greens. A must-see for anyone who is interested in sociology. Only 4 1/2 stars due to the amount of repetition (especially the 7 Up footage in Seven Plus Seven), but I can't wait to watch the rest, even though I already know what happened to all of them (I can't resist spoilers!).

Hannah and Her Sisters - Netflix has decided that it hates my boyfriend, as it keeps ignoring his Pete and Pete DVDs. It sent us this instead. I really liked Woody Allen as a senior in high school, ever since we watched Crimes and Misdemeanors in Philosophy class. I liked Annie Hall as well. This movie just didn't do it for me; I had trouble paying attention. In fact, it's still playing as I type this. I like character-driven movies when I'm in the right mood; I guess I'm just not in that place right now. One star.

Instruction Manuals

I just bought a fan at Target, and something tells me the person who wrote the instruction manual isn't a native English-speaker.

"Put the rear base on the body by inserting the cylinders under the body into the holes on the rear base as shown on diagram."

"Put front base on rear base and body and fix body, rear base and front base by screws (4) as shown."

"Press power cord with cord mount (6) and fixed by screws (5)."

And my personal favorite:

"Be sure to keep water and other liquids away from the water."

Mic Check 1 2 3 4

Last night I posted a link to an...interesting...website. I don't know if it's a joke or not, but I truly hope it is. I first learned about Devastatin' Dave from this website, which I posted earlier. Upon further googling last night, my friend, my boyfriend, and I almost had heart attacks from laughing after finding these two websites. I think we crashed the website because they weren't expecting anyone to view it, much less download the songs. I was not aware that Devastatin'' Dave, the cyber slave, formerly known as the turntable slave, now known as DVDee (he informs us of this in one of his "raps") existed. Every single one of his raps consist of a Casio keyboard followed by either a mic check or counting, followed by lyrics (in which every single word rhymes) about either gangbanging, doing cocaine, or God. I really can't do it justice in my explanation.

Here is a lyric sample from "The Westside Bronx:"

Party People
Devastatin' Dave, the turntable slave, from a group of brothers called the brotherhood.
Let me tell you a little story about where we come from.
It's called Lynnwood, the Lynn Lynn Wood. (repeat 3 times for some inexplicable reason).
Check it out
All the girlies say that my raps are perfecto.
They are kind of special.
They earn me respecto.

Yeah...

And surprisingly, Devastatin' Dave is in need of a good manager and a distribution deal!

If I'm feeling creative later on I may try writing my own rap, Devastatin' Dave style. Prepare yourselves! In the meantime, you can check out his website and buy a vast array of Devastatin' Dave memorabilia like a dog t-shirt, a thong, a bbq apron, or greeting cards.

The Best Argument for Being Drug Free...

is here (turn your speakers up first).

Some Random Thoughts

Traffic was so light this morning! It was awesome! I was 10 minutes late leaving, and I still arrived at work at the same time.

It has been so humid the past couple days that everything smells like mildew.

It's Friday!!!

I should start seriously looking into grad school at some point soon.

Only 16 days of work until 4th of July vacation.

Coldplay

I have VH-1 on in the background and they have Storytellers: Coldplay on. They're actually pretty cool!

Why Do I Keep Doing This to Myself?

I watched Britney and Kevin: Chaotic again last night. I'm a glutton for punishment. There were a couple of scenes where she was in her hotel room singing; the girl sounds like ass! I know her fame comes primarily for her looks, but pop singers should have pleasant voices, at the very least. I realize that they are pro-tooled within an inch of their lives. I guess they just need not to sing in their hotel rooms while their weasel-looking boy toys are taping them.

My boyfriend and I also watched that TV movie about Robin Williams. He only watched it because he wanted to see him do cocaine and cry when John Belushi died. I always thought Robin Williams was one of the most annoying people in the world, but now I feel that his need to always be "on" and the center of attention comes from a more deep-seeded issue that was not addressed in this movie.

This Isn't Telling Me Anything I Didn't Already Know!

You scored as Existentialist. Existentialism emphasizes human capability. There is no greater power interfering with life and thus it is up to us to make things happen. Sometimes considered a negative and depressing world view, your optimism towards human accomplishment is immense. Mankind is condemned to be free and must accept the responsibility.

Existentialist - 88%
Materialist - 75%
Modernist - 69%
Postmodernist - 63%
Cultural Creative - 56%
Fundamentalist - 44%
Romanticist - 44%
Idealist - 19%

Take this quiz here.

The Interview

Questions by Jenn:

1) You love Bo Bice. Why? :)

Because he kicks ass :-) I've watched AI for about 95% of its run. When Bo came on and sang "Whipping Post," it was a total "wow" moment. The Allman Brothers on AI? It had never been done before. Bo is genuine, and you can tell. I think by definition if you are a contestant on AI you are a famewhore, but Bo is on the lower end of the spectrum as far as fame-whoring goes. I loved pretty much everything he did on the show. He's a great performer, he has the maturity that most of the contestants don't have, he has an awesome voice, and he's good-looking. I remember being worried on 70s dance night because I thought he would be a trainwreck, but he came out and rocked "Vehicle." He got up on the judges' table during "Remedy." He made me not associate "For the Love of Money" with Donald Trump. He seems funny, warm, and intelligent during interviews; he encouraged the audience to applaud for Carrie when she won; he seemed genuinely upset when Constantine was voted off. He's the whole package, and I hope he has longevity if he wants it, because he's a good ol' boy (but not in the bad sense) from Alabama.

2) I saw where you said you are a liberal republican. Do you think it's possible to be a republican and hate Bush the way us democrats do?

Yes, because I do :-). I voted for Gore in '00 and Kerry in '04; I'm a registered democrat. My political affiliation has changed a little bit over the years because I see the importance of personal responsibility and think the government should play a smaller role in our lives. I took one of those online quizzes, and I'm basically 70% liberal, 30% conservative. I don't know to which political party I belong. I think Dubya is a complete idiot, an arrogant asshole, and he lied to us in order to get us to support the war. Weapons of Mass Destruction, my ass. Dubya was just trying to finish what his father started, which is go after Saddam Hussein, who has NOTHING to do with September 11. He used September 11 to stir the public's emotions. He's all propaganda, and he's trying to turn our nation into a religious state. It's perfectly fine to be religious, but keep it out of the government. He lost in '00 and he barely eked out a win in '04; and his approval ratings are going down the drain. Whenever anyone I know who voted for him complains about the cost of their health insurance I tell them that they brought it upon themselves. We impeached Clinton for receiving oral sex from an intern and lying about it...I think what Dubya did is much worse. And he banned partial-birth abortion and tried to keep Terri Schiavo from being put out of her misery. I could go on and on about my hatred for him, but I'll probably be arrested due to the Patriot Act...

3) What kind of career do you have? Are you happy with the career choices you've made?

I have bachelor's degrees in Spanish and Psychology. I was originally only a Spanish major, but I hated it so I added psych. I started my post-college career as a Family Advocate. I went to people's houses and helped them with parenting, budgeting, etc. I have many crazy stories from that job, but I hated it. Now I'm an intake coordinator for the same agency but in a different office. My job now doesn't really relate to my major and I wouldn't necessarily call it a career. I like it though. I have my own office and my own computer. I have set hours and my job is pretty easy. I don't have to go into people's cockroach-infested, pee-smelling houses (although some of the people who come into our office smell like pee). I don't have to work with Children and Youth anymore--I really didn't like some of the things they did. I don't know what I ultimately want to do. I'm leaning towards Human Resources, but we'll see. I'm happy with my choices, because I love psych and it's fascinating, but I wish I had been an English teacher because I love reading and writing; however it wouldn't be feasible for me to go back to school now. I've learned not to plan life because things never work out the way they were planned :-).

4) You have a boyfriend that drives you crazy. You seem like Autumn when it comes to only wanting them part time. I'll ask you what I asked her: do you think if the right one (if that's not the guy you are currently with) came along that you would change your mind and want him full time?

It's really not him, it's me. I'm an independent person who likes to do what I want when I want. I'm also a control freak, so I have a hard time compromising. He's great, but we have really incompatible housekeeping styles. I don't think that "the one" exists, but my boyfriend now is as close as I've ever come, and I love him to death (believe it or not, Chris). That being said, I don't think it would matter who my boyfriend was; I would feel that way no matter what. And although I say it would be nice to only have someone around when I want him around; I wouldn't change the way things are now for anything.

5) York sounds a lot like my hometown in Kentucky. It's a love/hate relationship, isn't it?

It really is! Being away from York for college made me really appreciate it though. To me, York is the friend who you make fun of, but they know you're doing it out of love. There are a lot of crappy things about York, but there are just as many, if not more, great things. We're 4 hours or fewer away from DC, NYC, Baltimore, Philly, and a couple of beaches. We have some semblance of culture here. Most of my friends and family are here, and I'm comfortable with York. I know my way around; I even have the cycles of the stoplights memorized. There really isn't anything that I need that we don't have here. And of course there are ignorant people, but they exist everywhere. York is great for people watching; we have some of the most majestic mullets in the world!

Man, I'm long-winded :-).

The Official Interview Game Rules

1. If you want to participate, leave a comment below saying "“interview me."
2. I will respond by asking you five questions;— each person'’s will be different.
3. You will update your journal/blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview others in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

If you want to be interviewed by me I'll do it, but I have no creativity, so don't be surprised if I ask you your favorite color and food :-P.

Something to Cheer You Up on a Monday Morning

This? Is hilarious.

I Heart Bo Bice

Congratulations, Bo! Your single is at number 7 on Amazon.com and number 1 on BarnesandNoble.com! *coughCarrieisonlyat26and3respectivelycough* And the Rolling Stone reporter who has been following you called you eloquent and interesting (but we already knew that...except for "gendre")! You freakin' rock! See you in 6 weeks!

Grammar is Everything

Seen on Paris Hilton: A T-shirt reading "I'm hot" on the front and "your not" on the back. Sigh...

Netflix Reviews for June 3-5

Meet the Fockers: This movie supports the argument that sequels are rarely as good as the first movie. I love Ben Stiller, but he plays the same damn character in every movie. I also love Robert De Niro (how can you not?), but his character has no redeeming qualities. If my dad tried to tell me that he wasn't sure if I could get married until he approved of my fiance's parents, he would be told to stick it where the sun doesn't shine. My best friend and I were marveling at the fact that we didn't hate Barbra Streisand with the fire of a thousand suns in this movie; then we watched her interview in the bonus features and our hate returned. And I really do not like Teri Polo. Her acting is stiff and one-dimentional, and she most certainly is not up to par with this all-star cast. To sum up this movie: some laughs, some WTF glances, some awkward moments, some getting up to get more soda or pee without finding it necessary to pause the movie. Three stars.

Embedded/Live: I didn't pick this. Well, I got an e-mail from Netflix about it and I put it in my queue, but it wasn't at the top. Netflix randomly sent it to me. They do that sometimes. It's ok except for when you REALLY want the movie that is at number 1 and they send you a number 5. Anyway, this is a play written and directed by Tim Robbins. It was entertaining enough, but Fahrenheit 9/11 was more informative and emotional. Three stars.

Real Women Have Curves: I give this movie three stars. There really isn't too much to say about it. It didn't suck, but it wasn't awesome. Worth renting from Netflix, but not renting for $5 from Blockbuster (hate!). I impressed myself with how much Spanish I remember. *Interesting note: Lupe Ontiveros, the woman who played the mother, began her career playing Whore #2 in The World's Greatest Lover!

Sudoku

I found this game after reading this article at the Slate, and I spent an inordinate amount of time playing it today. Don't play it if you become addicted to games and puzzles easily!

Weird Things That I Have Seen in the Past Few Days

I'm so glad to be home today! The streetrods are in town, so traffic is horrendous! I understand that these people put a lot of time and money into their streetrods, but do they really have to be driving around town at rush hour on one of the busiest roads in York?

But I digress. The real reason that I'm writing this post is that I'm always seeing weird/stupid shit that makes me wish I were with someone so that he or she could experience it with me. The other day on my way to work I saw a car sitting on the side of the road. Both of its taillights were busted out. One was covered with part of a Sunmaid Raisin box and one was covered with part of a case of Coke. Then they had been spraypainted with red paint. Now, if you're going to go to the trouble of finding something red to cover the lights, why would you bother to spraypaint it? Not to mention, the spraypaint had run down onto the bumper. Then I noticed that the car had a "For Sale" sign in its window.

Today as I was driving home (keep in mind that it's only about 60 degrees and there is a steady rain) I saw this girl walking down the sidewalk wearing only socks (well, she had clothes on, but she only had socks on her feet). Even though she was walking on the sidewalk, she was walking on the edge as if it were a balance beam. This wouldn't be so bad, except for the fact that she kept almost falling off into traffic. When I got closer I noticed she was chewing on her hair. We've got some good 'uns in York.

I'll post more as I see/remember things.

It Could Only Happen to Me...

It is only 11:00, yet I have managed to drop a cigarette down my shirt (this is a new one; usually I drop them in my lap), almost get hit by a car as I'm crossing the street (I'm walking across the street as cars are stopped at a red light. As I get to the middle of the intersection, the woman in front suddenly decides that now would be a good time to gun it. It was not a good time. She didn't even apologize!), and have my water bottle explode, covering me and my desk.

Confidential to MR in PA

"Forgiveness prease!" Episode 4F08

These Look Like Mah Boobs, Y'all, but They're Mah Knees!

Oh my god, you guys. I watched Britney and Kevin: Chaotic last night. Yeah. I don't know if I should feel sorry for Britney, or feel sorry for myself for being exposed to that. I guess there's no need to feel sorry for her though; she chose to have her dysfunctional relationship broadcast on national TV for millions to see...err, on UPN for tens to see. And the girl is clearly not over Justin Timberlake. It's sort of obvious that she replaced him with a less-good-looking, less-talented, less-clean version. Their conversations are so deep too..."Love is love, but love is not love because love is scary and I'm scared which makes you scared to love me, and pass the Red Bull and Cheetos, Cletus."

And oh, how Britney has let herself go! She's a very pretty girl, but I now see the magic of air-brushing. I occasionally break out myself, but I do not record myself wearing no make-up when I have zits. The girl's got pores the size of Lake Michigan!

On second thought, I do feel sorry for her. She's not smart enough to realize that Kevin is only with her for her money and her sex (it's certainly not her sparkling wit or conversation skills). It will be hard for her to be a single mother at age 24. And she has no idea what it's like in the real world. I saw a quote from her once where she actually said it was hard having maids, gardeners, etc. I feel sorry for that child...

Why "The War on Drugs" Is Not Effective

I’m a total psychology nerd. A few months ago I read Opening Skinner’s Box: Great Psychological experiments of the Twentieth Century, by Lauren Slater. There was an interesting vignette in there about Dr. Bruce Alexander’s Rat Park. This experiment dealt with morphine addiction in rats. There were 2 groups: rats in a normal laboratory cage, and rats in “Rat Park,” a utopia of sorts for rats. Both groups of rats were given the same choice: regular tap water, or sweetened water with morphine. Rats have a proclivity to sweetened water. In some of the experiments, the rats were forced to drink only morphine-laced water for 57 days prior to being given a choice. The rats in the regular cage drank only the water with morphine; in fact, they consumed 20 times more morphine than the rats in Rat Park. They even drank the morphine water when it had no sweetener (morphine is naturally bitter, which the rats do not like.)

When Naxalone, a substance that cancels the narcotic effects of morphine, was added, the Rat Park rats drank the sweet water, proving that they preferred the sweetness, but did not want the effects of the morphine. Even when they became forced addicts by being given only morphine water for 57 days, they returned to tap water when given a choice.

So what does this mean? This means that the $1200 per second ($40 billion dollars per year) that the government spent in 2003 to stop drug use was worthless. The government can give out all the methadone and run all the rehab hospitals it wants, but without fixing the communities in which these people live, none of it will work. Happy rats did not become addicts. How many truly happy people do you know who are addicts? How many addicts are truly happy? We need to start looking at our education and healthcare systems; as well as the condition of our cities. This is not likely to happen with a Republican in office.

More information can be found at this website.

Things I'm Excited for in July

I was looking at my calendar for June thinking about what is going on this month, and I realized that June is going to be boring as hell. I'm getting my hair highlighted and cut on Saturday, which is cool; I'm being dragged to a wedding that I REALLY do not want to go to on the 11th, which is not cool; and my family is making homemade strawberry ice cream on Father's Day (heaven in a bowl). Other than that, nada. So here are the things I am excited for in July:

• I'm off work on July 4.
• Charlie and the Chocolate Factory comes out on July 15.
• The neighborhood crab feast is on July 16.
• I'm off July 18-20
• The reason I'm off those days is because the American Idol concert is July 19 and you better believe I'm going. I get to be in the same place as Bo :-).

Wow, I'm a loser.