Monday, November 07, 2005

Steven Seagal

Holy crap. The Glimmer Man was on Fox yesterday. There are no words. This is the conversation that MR and I had at the beginning of the movie.

MR: Steven Seagal is the worst. actor. ever.
Jen: (Wondering if she wants to remain friends with a person who watches Steven Seagal movies.) How many Steven Seagal movies have you seen?
MR: You don't have to watch a lot of Steven Seagal movies to know that he's a horrible actor.
Steven Seagal: (Delivers a line.)
Jen: I see what you mean.

Everything he said was delivered in the same monotone voice. In one scene there's some kid (Johnny, as we come to learn later) who is holding his classroom hostage. Steven lunges at him, and they go crashing out of the window. Immediate cut to them somehow breaking the laws of physics and crashing into a room via another window. Cut to some girl yelling, "Johnny, I love you!" I was confused.


Blogger Rusty said...

LMAO! That's exactly how it went down, I agree. Except for the part where you wondered if you still wanted to be friends with someone who watches Steven Segal movies. It's not like it was my choice! Plus, it only takes about 30 seconds to realize he's the worst. actor. ever. as you put it. Great post, especially since I was there.

11/07/2005 5:11 PM  
Blogger Jenny G said...

No, I did wonder about the friendship :-) I figured maybe your dad made you watch them or something.

11/08/2005 11:40 AM  
Blogger katiedid said...

He's so bad that I, who normally love bad movies, cannot sit through more than 5 minutes of him. It's like some stuff is so bad that it circles back to being good, but with him it just circles around one more time to stay at bad.

11/10/2005 11:53 AM  
Blogger Jenny G said...

LOL I agree wholeheartedly.

11/10/2005 3:15 PM  
Blogger Ben said...

And soon the insurgents will be feeling the sting of Seagal's painful dialogue. Check it out.

12/11/2005 6:38 PM  
Blogger Jenny G said...


12/11/2005 6:42 PM  

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