I've had this post simmering for a while, but considering I had a message at work today from a man named Seymour Butts (hand to God!), I figured now was a great time to post it. This is a list of my 10 favorite Simpsons quotes, in no particular order:
Mr. Burns: "Ironic, isn't it Smithers? This anonymous clan of slack-jawed troglodytes cost me the election, yet if I were to have them killed, I'd be the one to go to jail. That's democracy for you."
Skinner: "Nibbles, chew through my ball sack."
Kang: "Abortions for all."
[Half of crowd boos]
"Very well, no abortions for anyone.
[Other half of crowd boos]
Hmm...Abortions for some, miniature American flags for others.
[Whole crowd cheers]
Shary Bobbins: "Hello Willie."
Lisa: "You know her?"
Willie: "Aye. Shary Bobbins and I were engaged to be wed back in the old country. Then she got her eyesight back. Suddenly the ugliest man in Glasgow wasn't good enough for her."
Shary: "It's good to see you , Willie."
Willie: "That's not what you said the first time you saw me!"
Troy McClure: "Hi! I'm actor Troy McClure and you may remember me from such self-help videos as Smoke Yourself Thin and Get Some Confidence, Stupid."
Ned: [Walking up, singing] Bringing in the sheaves, bringing in the--oh my Lord! Something horrible has happened!
Homer: [Snickers, then laughs] Fooled you Flanders! Made you think your family was dead!
Ned: Oooh...That's quite a thing-a-ma-jigsaw! But it looks like you're missing a piece...
Homer: Looks like you're missing a wife!
Flanders: Heh heh. I walked right into that one.
Homer (singing to the tune of the Flintstones theme song): Simpson/Homer Simpson/He's the greatest guy in history/From the/town of Springfield/He's about to hit a chestnut tree!
Homer, in a video he made in which he describes Lisa: "My favorite book is magazines."
Homer: "Aw, twenty dollars! I wanted a peanut!"
Homer's Brain: "Twenty dollars can buy many peanuts!"
Homer: "Explain how!"
Homer's Brain: "Money can be exchanged for goods and services!"
And a bonus:
Homer: "Are you saying you're never going to eat any animal again? What about bacon?"
Homer: "Pork chops?"
Lisa: "Dad, those all come from the same animal."
Homer: "Heh heh heh. Ooh, yeah, right, Lisa. A wonderful, magical animal."