My Idols

Martha Stewart - She's a bitch and she's good at cooking, sewing, decorating, etc. She has this way about her where she's able to say the meanest things while making them sound polite. I totally want to be her.

Elton John - I like Elton John's old music, but that's not the reason he is my idol. He's my idol because he made a rule at his parties that no one is allowed to talk to him unless he talks to them first.

My mom - My mom is like Martha Stewart to a lesser extent. We were driving to one of the ritzy neighborhoods last weekend and we passed some crappy apartment where people had their junky cars parked on their lawns. My mom's observation, "I'd hate to have to drive through this shit to get to my nice house." Hee! My mom's also awesome though, and has done tons of stuff for me over the years. My only hope is that I can be half as generous with my children (if I have any) than she has been with me.

*An update on my Dr. Phil hate. I read an article where he said that his wife told him before they got married, "You make the living, and I'll make it worth living." I now hate Dr. Phil's wife almost as much as I hate him.